Despite a global pandemic and a global economic crisis, Australians didn’t hold back in celebrating the new financial year. There was much lively and rowdy celebrating across the country as a nation blearily saw in the exciting new financial year of 2020-2021. Or The End Times, Very Last Financial Year Ever as it’s known in financial circles.
“Woohoo! Happy new financial year”! Some hordes of young Sydney actuaries were heard to yell from cars as they roared around the beach side suburbs insouciantly waving USBs of expense accounts.
Sadly, due to COVID 19, the traditional fireworks and bookkeeping displays in the main capital cities were cancelled. Instead large projected screens of videos on how to manually enter a tax return with celebrity host Jimmy Barnes were displayed.
Due to a daylight saving quirk Queensland was celebrating happy new financial year 1955. Meanwhile, in the ACT, people gathered around the largest roundabout that can also be claimed as a half flex day.
Here’s how it was celebrated coast to coast:
- Pillaging and looting own houses in order to claim it back from the ATO in little known “Viking clause”.
- Moving paper clips awkwardly. Creating a paper clip chain.
- “Excel spreadsheet parties” give new meaning to ‘dropping an E’.
- Opening a bottle of champagne in backyard bunker wearing masks and gloating over claiming expensive handbag purchase as “office storage”
- Firing off BAS statements at the stroke of midnight in a series of awe-inspiring synchronised faxes
- Responsibly sipping from paper cup of cordial and munching on packet of Arnotts biccies due to “budget cuts”
- Drunkenly moving “Assets and Income 2016′ folder into trash folder
- Celebratory “burning of the books” bonfire before ATO tax agents arrive
- Staring deeply and soberly into the frightening face of financial ruin. And listening to Jay Z. The other album.